Barbra Streisand

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Gm
The average unmarried female
D
Basically insecure
Gm                        Dm
Due to some long frustration
Eb    F       Eb  F  D
May react
Gm
With psychosomatic symptoms
D  D7
Difficult to endure
G                       Db11         C9
Affecting the upper respiratory tract
F6
In other words
A7
Just from waiting around
Bb                          Bbm6
For that plain little band of gold
F         Gm7      C9       F6  F9
A person    can develop a cold
Bb6
You can spray her wherever you figure
Bbm7  Bbm6
The streptococci   lurk
F6
You can give her a shot for whatever she's got
F                       F7
But it just won't work
Bb6                       Bb7
If she's tired of getting the fish-eye
F         Bbm6
From the hotel clerk
F          Gm7    C9         F  C7  F
A person     can develop a cold       it says here
Gm
The female remaining single
D
Just in the legal sense
Gm                       Dm  Eb  F  Eb  F  D
Shows a neurotic tendency
Gm
Chronic organic syndromes
D  D7
Toxic or hypertense
G
Involving the eye
Db11                     C9
The ear    the nose and throat
F6                                       A7
In other words just from wondering
Bb                      Bb6
Whether the wedding is on or off
F           Gm7        C9        F6  F9
A person       can develop a cough
Bb
You can feed her all day
Bbm7  Bbm6
With the Vitamin A and the Bromo Fizz
F6
But the medicine never
F  F7
Gets anywhere near where the trouble is
Bb6                     Bb7
If she's getting a kind of name for herself
F
And the name ain't "his"
F           Gm7        C9        F  F7  D7
A person       can develop a cough
G                                    B7
And further more just from stalling
C
And stalling and stalling
Cm6
The wedding trip
G         Am7        D9        G  G7
A person     can develop La gripe
C
When they get on a train
Cm7  Cm6
For Niag'ra and she can hear church bells chime
G6
The compartment is air conditioned
G6                  G9
And the mood sublime
C                   C7
Then they get off at Saratoga
G             Cm6
For the fourteenth time
G         Am7        D9        G  G7
A person     can develop La gripe
C
La grippe la post nasal drip
Cm7            Cm6
With the wheezes and the sneezes
G6
And a sinus that's really a pip
G6                  G9
From a lack of community property
C                   C7
And a feeling shes getting too old
G         Am7        D9       G       G7
A person     can develop a big bad cold